Too much Statistic, Not Enough Luck

 

In a room of luminescent light, I sat and stared.

 

Earshot of estatic shouts crescendoed over the thumping bass.

 

Frocks of all sex swayed like leaves bending to the will of the wind.

 

Behemoths masculine dancing side to dainty sensual feminine stalks.

 

Amidst this cacophony of light and sound, I sat alone.

 

In sooth, tis not a natural high, but angst which fills the very soul.

 

The glass of hop will not do, nor will the ode from the vinyl piper.

 

A friendly hand grabs on to mine to resuscitate a ailing spirit.

 

I stood up... faced the music...regardless of a sense of heart...

 

In a crowd of many...I danced alone...

The Wall of Text

 

Before my eyes, stood a wall of text;

in future, past and present tense.

Adjectives, adverbs and punctuations

All misplaced! Even syntax & patois!

Ideas scattered by the four winds,

Non coherent…without plausible logic.

It shrieked as I saw this conflagration.

My eyes soiled by the farce from this

hoi polloi.

 

“Enough!” my scholarly pride had bellowed.

This was all that it could take.

 

I shall return this flimsy bulwark back;

back to the infertile soil of ideas,

which not from enlightened mind.

But one that left its land of thought uncultivated;

and as I perform such feat;

I…will give it meaning

 

The tracing arrow sharp and pointed,

stirred to amend the bricks mislaid.

Upon each highlighted selection;

Delete…replace…new word and space

each block now logically tapped,

with the mortar of my human ingenuity.

 

(to be continued) 

 

 

 

'Cause it's a bittersweet symphony, this life
Try to make ends meet
Your a slave to money then you die
I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down
You know the one that takes you to the places
where all the things meet yeah

No change, I can't change
I can't change, I can't change
But I'm here in my mold
I am here in my mold
But I'm a million different people
from one day to the next
I can't change my mold
No, no, no, no, no

Well I never pray
But tonight I'm on my knees yeah
I need to hear some sounds that recognize the pain in me, yeah
I let the melody shine, let it cleanse my mind, I feel free now
But the airways are clean and there's nobody singing to me now

No change, I can't change
I can't change, I can't change
But I'm here in my mold
I am here in my mold
And I'm a million different people
from one day to the next
I can't change my mold
No, no, no, no, no
I can't change
I can't change

'Cause it's a bittersweet symphony, this life
Try to make ends meet
Try to find some money then you die
I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down
You know the one that takes you to the places
where all the things meet yeah

You know I can't change, I can't change
I can't change, I can't change
But I'm here in my mold
I am here in my mold
And I'm a million different people
from one day to the next
I can't change my mold
No, no, no, no, no

I can't change my mold
no, no, no, no, no,
I can't change
Can't change my body,
no, no, no

I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down
I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down
Been down
Ever been down
Ever been down
Ever been down
Ever been down
That you've ever been down
That you've ever been down

I'm going to start this entry as generic as possible, and try to use the most cliche beginning and that is...It was a scorching day. I had just travelled from uni to Redfern Station. The weather was what did it, I walked as fast as possible hoping to get home before the dinner with my Uncle and Auntie. I should have been more relaxed, but instead I sped towards my destination, even though I had two hours left. The world became impossible to recollect thanks to my walking pace. It was so hard that as I got on the train, I cannot remember the subtle actitivites in the background as I walked nor could I picture the scenes in my head. It was utterly blank.

 

As soon as I got to the station, the train had left the platform, I stared at it from the stairs as the heatwaves trailed the train carriage, that was picking up momentum.

 

"Damn...missed the thing."

 

As it left, there was only one course of action, and that was to check the times and luckily there was one coming in precisely two minutes. With a sense of calming impatience to get out of the heat, a thought had struck me from events during the day. I began to ponder whether the good, capable of comitting evil are more intelligent than the good people, that can only act in benevolence. If the people are good, but they sometimes excercise evil does this mean they are bad? It would be logical to realise that by knowing evil we know both world; hence it is more clear to us the defining lines that separates the two entities. If we were good however, we would only know what is good and anything which does not fit into the heuristics of good becomes evil.

 

What if the good we've known all our lives was really evil, and yet the norm still acts justifying it is good. Does that make evil good? Another idea is what if the good you've learnt led you to evil actions, does that make you a bad man/woman? If this be true clearly what is good or bad is merely described by actions. So is it smarter to understand both or to simply understand one? I got off the train and walked to the stairs of the platform as I stopped my catatonic state momentarily to leave. People ran past me; up the stairs hoping to catch a train back to their enjoyable lives, away from the sactions of the workplace and profession. A curse can be heard from the bottom of the stairs as a middle aged man, from Caucasian descent, was angered by the public transport at the top of the stairs leading to the platform.

 

It was so hot that I decided to goto my favourite kiosk to buy my favorite streets magnum toffee ice cream. Coated with chocolate with toffee pieces giving it a chewy taste and well as quenching the rising temperature. As I ate the cold confectionary, I paced towards the waiting spot where I was suppose to be picked up. Upon reaching the place, my weary body sat on the brick fence still ever thinking about good and evil. It had just realised to me it was against some principles which I had thought. With only good there was no need for evil, but its seems that my thoughts had led me to something else. What if they could coincide simultaneously, is it possible to be good and evil at the same time with the same action?

 

As i pondered a bit more, my favorite ice cream fell to floor, only to be finished off by a passing canine.

 

"Well!" I thought as I realised my stupidity to think of such things"At least I finished the other half."

 

 

 

The Siren calls to those sailors of life. Her songs bewilder and conjures strife.

All who hears are certain of doom, but

because I won't listen...therefore death won't come soon.

A glass of hops or nectar of the gods; which changes all from normal to odd

happiness, joy and bravery was never true, but

because I won't drink...therefore no harm from this brew.

Currency of man leads followers to darkness. Worldy material; changing saint to bastard.

Those whose blaspheme do not heed, but

because I won't follow...therefore my thoughts, not of greed.

The writings of man persuades and conforms, those who read become part of the norm.

Consciousness becoming collective and whole, but

because I won't join...therefore the unique are not sold.

Downfall stalks all the corrupt, who loses their ethics and morals as such

It is a result of integrity which has been easily siphoned.

 

Because I won't let it...Therefore it will not happen.

Like a movie noir from the 1950s I walked out of the dank apartment...The weather...it had rained...The heavenly droplets fused with the road creating a natural yet unlcear mirror. I looked upon this reflective distortion attempting to see ones image; Yet all I see is blur. I began to sense my surroundings using all my human abilties, but nothingness enveloped; I was truly alone. I walked towards my car; down the flight of stairs; past the sidewalk; halfway to the otherside of the road. Wind rustled the trees around me. I stared into the distance of the road, attempting to discern familiar landscapes yet I had found none.

 

"Something was wrong!" I had thought

 

There was no answer; that much I knew.

 

My insignificant trek re-commenced. It didn't matter how I felt. It never really did. It was then that I began to recollect a previous memory of the day.

 

My little sister listened to my lecture about driving too fast. I did my best to prepare her for something that will be 11 years from now. Yet she simply replied to me

 

"Remember not to drive too fast either,"

 

I guess I'm driving too fast with no set pace. Brakes are there yet I choose not to slow down. So does it mean its dangerous? Or am I simply beginning to worry about pace.

 

I'll decide eventually...I always do.